smoke cigars, moonlit night

play the game until midnight

Fire in the air into the night

Fire in the air dead to the right

curious friendly scene

enemy war machine

Fire in the air into the night

Fire in the air dead to the right

peaceful time, singing songs

across the trench been so long



To Be

To love
Is to need
As it is
To bleed

To hate
Is to take
As it is
To ache

To lust
Is to want
As it is
To haunt

But to give
Is new
As it is
To you

It’s Not Your Fault

It’s OK…
It’s not your fault…
You were just taken over by…
The devil?
Your mind?
It’s OK…
Because it’s my fault I’m like this…
It’s not like I was forced…
I could’ve told you…
to STOP…
to GO AWAY….
It’s OK….
Just do one thing for me…
Once you’re done with me…
Don’t leave me here like this…

Part 3

Death seems to only await
Longing for that one true day
That I won’t hide away from hate
Then turn around and say okay

I’ll be ready to leave this body
Mind and spirit will be free
I’ll be ready for my entry
Into this tragedy

It wasn’t all your fault
I played a part in it too
I was sort of on default
And it was my cue

To hit the self-destruct button
That was flashing at me
A self-defense action
That was just meant to be

Part 2

The moon shines down
Like a round stain on the water
No matter how cold it gets
I’m still getting hotter
Thoughts keep running through my head
Emotions deep inside me burn
Passion, Anger, Sorrow, Hurt
All emotions I will learn
You put this pain with in me
Lies meant to deceive my heart
You promised light to lead the way
But just left me in the dark
Push and shove though the crowd
How I try to run away
To live then to die
Is the price I have to pay

Part 1

A night I fall asleep
You are on my mind
It’s as if they creep
Inside my head to find
My deepest darkest secrets
And bring them back to you
Inflicting those deep cuts
Though my heart is still new
But I keep myself guarded
Against all the pain
I keep myself protected
Confusion driving me insane
My heart holds on to hope
That maybe you’ll come back
Because I just can’t cope
With this emotional attack

Jack and Coke

He laughed in my face.

It was a deep thundering sound, full to the brim with mockery. And I could feel the heat rise to my cheeks, reddening them so bright I thought I would explode from embarrassment.

This was the part that always frustrated me. This was the part that scared me the most. This was always when they would awkwardly chuckle or say in a surprised tone, “Oh!” I don’t think they meant to make me feel like shit. I think they just didn’t realize I was telling the truth. At least until I would say, “No really. It’s true.”

Then either they would immediately shut up or give me that annoying look of pity.

But this guy, he was different. He didn’t shut up or give me his most piteous gaze. He laughed. And continued to laugh. And all I could do was stare at him in bewilderment.


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